so...

I'm not unfamiliar with pain. Where emotions are concerned, it's almost like I can recite the sequence by heart. The first staggering blow, and the ache lingers in the ambience like a distinct bitterness, sometimes so horrible it makes you hate yourself for ever bringing it upon yourself. With time, it fades off like how the worst pain always does, as new and better memories of the perpetrator form to cover old wounds. And it can take a few weeks, or a few months, but this is the far end of 'a few months' and it still hurts like it did at the moment it happened, and hurts again when I remember all the events preceding it, foreshadowing it. I don't know why it won't go away.

(I'll continue with the confessions on the next post...I can't access Blogger and my drafts from my phone.)